Thursday, May 10, 2012

OF BUGS & INSECTS by the feminist


Of Bugs & Insects… 

Do you hate home cooked food, prefer to eat oily junk food 5 times a week and still not get a pouchy tummy? If you can, then congratulations! Give yourselves a pat on the back and relax, for you are most definitely the teenage college group who have been given the supernatural power to do nothing but eat tons and tons of food and still not be a victim to the dreaded ‘ salad diet’ syndrome. And if you are, then I’m sure your wives and girlfriends have already said everything there is to say and will I save you further embarrassment and not comment on the one pack muscles that you are the proud owner of.

I bet all of us at one point or the other have narrated a very fascinating and interesting tale of how much we are capable of gulping down our throats without choking on it in one go. And our friends have looked at us with admiration and maybe if you look closely, even a few jealous looks. That is the moment when we resemble that character from the Scooby dooby show.  Of course not the dog, I meant shaggy, the tall thin guy with the eating capacity of a gorilla, remember? Tap your - hidden from the world – cartoon network side of the brain and you would know it to be true.

So once you’ve stumbled across the fact that junk food tastes far better than home cooked low fat, low cholesterol, low everything food; you would without fail try to distract your mom from cooking and take her out by buttering her with all kinds of honey coated words.

However, I’m sure your view would change as soon as you are forced to eat the food that they serve in the mess, which is if you are ever unlucky enough to go away from home and land up in a hostel in the middle of nowhere. Personally, by the way they chop vegetables, I think they must be meat butchers before this job and were punished and forced to cook for us. And the utensils they serve you food in would undoubtedly be cleaner if you give it to a cat to lick it. And then right when you make up your mind and sit down to eat… BOOM! You would suddenly notice that you are meant to share it with another creature that you find struggling inside the curry. If this isn’t already enough, some of the days, you might even know precisely the length and the texture of the cook’s precious hair.

The sole person that gains anything out of this is your mom. Because next time she prepares bacon for you at home, you would be grateful and eat it with a big smile on your face!

The Feminist. 

No comments:

Post a Comment